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The Complainer and Jesus
Imagine a tower of blocks, perhaps in the shape of a pyramid. You remove one block, and the tower becomes unstable, a section might even fall out. If you remove several blocks, the entire tower comes crashing down. Gossip has this effect upon the church.
Gossip is everywhere
How do you know if you’re gossiping? The Apostle Paul warned young Timothy, a church leader, to curb the gossip that was happening from “house to house.” Unfortunately, we don’t spend the same amount of time in each other’s homes as the early church did, but that doesn’t mean we lack the means for gossip. Today, gossip lurks on Facebook, in emails, over phone calls, through text messages, and good old-fashioned face-to-face.
How does gossip manifest itself? Over the course of this series, we will look at the three faces of gossip: complainer, leaker, and meddler – and how Jesus speaks to each.
Complaining about others to others
The Complainer: The Gossip who complains about others to others.
The complainer complains about others. This person is quick to find fault with others and slow to find fault with self. Someone is always getting on their nerves, hurting their feelings, or disappointing their expectations. How do we know? The Complainer is the gossip that complains and whines about others to others.
Choosing gossip over grace
Why do we choose to gossip through complaint? This form of gossip exists because we see ourselves as undeserving victims. We believe the lie that we deserve to be treated a certain way. We distort our identity in Christ by replacing it with identity-as-victim. We see ourselves as the brunt of others’ sins, not sinners who should bear the brunt of God’s wrath. Distancing ourselves from Christ, we choose gossip over grace, complaining over forbearing.
Instead of giving and receiving complaints, could you give and receive grace?
The complainer is adept at pointing out the sin problem, but will rarely offer a grace solution, especially if it means admitting he or she is wrong. The complainer believes the lie that they deserve something they didn’t get. They believe they are more important than others. If we got what we deserved, it would be judgment, but Jesus gives what we don’t deserve—grace.
Who is Jesus to the complainer?
Jesus is the only person in all of history who lived a perfect life and is the only person to ever have the right to complain. He is the truly innocent one, and yet, he was scorned, mocked, and frequently gossiped about.
Jesus didn’t even complain to others about those who betrayed him: “Can you believe that Peter would betray me, John, after all I’ve done for him?” Jesus’ willingness to die for complainers shows us how to respond in grace.
Only one undeserving victim
Complainers need to understand that Jesus alone is the undeserving victim. He died to free complainers from what they deserve to give them what they do not deserve. He bore our judgment to plead our innocence before a holy God.
You may need a few minutes to repent of your self-deserving victim identity, and turn to receive and extend grace to others out of your undeserved grace identity. We are neither the victim nor the hero, but Jesus is both to the Complainer. He is the willing victim of our sinful gossip and hero who rescues us from what we deserve. He bears our judgment and pleads our innocence. He offers us grace.
Give and receive grace, not complaints
Will we offer grace to others or will we complain about others to others? Instead of giving and receiving complaints, could you give and receive grace? Jesus purchased grace for us and others. Turn from being the victim and turn to others in grace.
Series edited by Greg Cox